Questions

Why am I here?

Isn’t this something I am supposed to know? As I sit here at the edge of my first real creative endeavor trying to figure out the content that could dictate the future of my efforts, why do I find myself drawing a blank? What am I trying to accomplish here? Do I need a reason aside from wanting an outlet for my thoughts, a release valve for the pressure buildup of my inner workings? Do we really need answers in this life or can value be found in simply asking the questions?

Am I only putting off getting started? Doesn’t that just feel like the story of my life? I know I’ve accomplished things and I know that I’m heading somewhere, so why do I always feel like I’m still at the starting line? Is it worth figuring these things out? Do questions just beget more questions? If I understand less with every answer I get, should I just stop asking for them?

Isn’t there a peace in knowing things? Aren’t I grateful that I don’t have to ask myself if I’m going to go hungry today because I know there is food in my pantry? But isn’t there a peace in not knowing things too? Is it ok that I don’t feel worry about my neighbor going hungry when I don’t know if they have food in their pantry or not?  If peace can be found either way then is my state of being always independent of what I know?

Aren’t actions similar in this way? Doesn’t what I know define what I do? If I know it’s cold outside then wouldn’t I wear a coat when I leave? But doesn’t what I don’t know also define what I do? If I don’t know what the temperature will be later in the day, then wouldn’t I still take a coat with me when I leave? So, do I really need to know things in order to act? And if how I act and how I feel are separate from what I know, then how much weight should I be placing in answers?

Don’t questions and knowledge just go hand in hand? If I ask you what time it is, would the answer mean anything to me if I don’t already know what time is and why the current time is relevant to my life? If questions already contain prerequisite knowledge then couldn’t you say that in many ways it seems as if questions already carry a lot of the weight? So, do I even need to answer them in order to get started?

Or have I already begun?